Cancer comes to stay

When my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma July 2004 we were in no way prepared for what the next 3 years had in store for us.  Although I’m not sure “being prepared” is even possible with cancer.  Our life was thrown into a realm that was completely foreign.  Words and we had never heard of, they spoke in  percentages 30% 80%  as we sat in the small room nodding our heads.  The Doctor said “we are all adults here”  My mind screaming “ I’m not an adult! What are they talking about? This can not be happening to us!”  Chills became rigors, what the nurses called uncontrollable shaking that rocked the whole bed.  Interferon, chemo for melanoma which causes Flu like systems, which is a total joke because I have never seen a flu like that!   We became regulars in the Oncology office where beds and couches are lined up and you are hooked up intravenously…Grey becomes a color you get used to.  Nurses don’t look you in the eye.  This became our new life, Our old life became a memory.  Strength became a word you to live by.  We learned the meaning of “Living each day as if it were your last” Everything changed and we were completely powerless.